BUYERS: Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott
LOCATION: Encino Avenue, Encino, CA
PRICE: $2,495,000
SIZE: 6,718 square feet, 6 bedrooms, 6.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: ...Sophisticated inviting entertainer's floor plan. Dramatic 2 stry formal entry, richly appointed cstm finishes, french drs, 4 frplcs, over sized common rms, wood & stone flring, dining rm w/ silver leaf coffered clngs, study, office, gourmet eat-in cntr isl kit w/ Thermador, Bosch, & SubZero apls. Amazing mstr ste w/ sitting area, blcny, frplc, spa tub & multi-head shwr. Landscaped grnds w/ lanai, bbq, pool/spa & putting green.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Like, Oh my gawd! Word on the Los Angeles real estate street is that Beverly Hills born ack-turus Tori Spelling (Beverly Hills 90210, So NoTORIous, Kiss the Bride) and her ack-tor huzband Dean McDermott (Due South, Power Play, 1-800-Missing) are moving up...and over to the San Fernando Valley.

It was recently reported here, there and everywhere that the peripatetic pair listed the 5 bedroom and 3.5 bathroom house in Los Angeles' Westwood neighborhood that they bought only last year and where they filmed their most recent reality show embarrassment Home Sweet Hollywood. (Sorry Tori hun, although Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter are both unrepentant reality show junkies and we think you are a-may-zing, we just don't care for those stinky reality shows you've been doing with your huzbeau.)

It was only a matter of time before all the whispers and rumors would start circulating about where the couple would be moving next and according to multiple of Your Mama's gorgeous informants Mister and Misses McDermott signed the purchase documents for big house in Encino just last week. Yes, children, Encino.

At this point we are unable to confirm the purchase with property records. However, two of our most reliable sources–the wickedly well informed Lucy Spillerguts and an often in the know gal we call Junebug–swear on their mama's lives that the couple scooped up a walled and gated house on Encino's Encino Avenue. Information we received from Junebug reveals the property was originally listed at $3,895,000, was later reduced to $2,995,000 and that the McDermott duo paid $2,495,000.

Listing information for the property reveals the so-called "Tuscan Villa" was built in 2001, measures in at a celebrity-sized 6,718 square feet and includes 6 bedrooms, 6.5 bathrooms (plenty of room for Candy to come visit), 4 fireplaces, and a 3 car front facing garage.

While the house hardly compares in size or day-core to the obscenely over sized Holmby Hills mansion in which Miss Spelling was reared, it does include a dramatic double height entrance hall with inlaid stone floors, a curving Scarlett O'Hara style staircase and a long, tubular chandelier that, for better or worse, looks like a column of sparkling diamonds.

Most of the downstairs rooms, including the formal living and dining rooms, the library, the eat in kitchen and family room all appear to have a complicated, and in our humble and meaningless opinion, a not very attractive parquet flooring.

While we appreciate that the large eat in kitchen includes all manner of high-grade appliances and has not been completely ruined by a gigantic and potentially lethal pot rack looming over the work island, we don't think this food preparation center is going to win any kitchen design awards. Functional, big and boring is how we would describe this kitchen.

Upstairs, the long master suite includes a sitting area focussed on a fireplace and a flat screen boob-toob that looks like it's mounted off -center of the mantel, a balcony overlooking the ratty back yard, and an unnecessarily glitzy hotel-like master bath that looks like it's straight out of the 1980s and which we seriously hope Mister and Missus McDermott will have done over by a nice gay decorator right away. Much to our own surprise (and chagrin), we do, however, like that wall to wall leopard printed carpet. Grrr.

The private backyard currently includes a large covered terrace where Dean can paint Tori's toenails in the shade while the kiddies frolic on the jungle gym, a built-in barbecue center, a swimming pool and spa with one of those horrid child safety fences (surely there is a more pleasing option than this), a putting green (pleez!) and a large lawn area that looks like it could use a drink of water.

Now that Miss Spelling has left the West Side behind in order to become a Valley Girl, we expect she'll soon be pushing strollers around the Sherman Oaks Galleria and shopping incognito at the Van Nuys Costco where she can get a family sized bag of frozen potstickers for like four bucks.